Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Departure to the Future

Welcome back..
Behind every blog, is a reason to blog. It's to keep some memory to the crazy things I do, but its all to keep everyone I love in the know of what I'm up to since many are so far away. Since I last wrote in July of last year - things have been pretty consistent! Not too much as changed.. but several things have progressed.

The relationship I found myself in last I wrote has remained a rather large part of what makes my day. Now over six months later, I find myself in a position that many women have been and are going through as I type. Outside looking in, a military relationship for both parties, is unbelievably undervalued. Although I am only 2 days, 2 nights, 4 hours and 18 minutes in to my boyfriend being deployed, the transition time leading up to deployment should be read in it's own 'How-To' book. I have roughly 7 months to go until he comes home. That timing is not promised, and could be up to a full year.

I am so very intrigued by his work. He hates tooting his own horn, but knows what he does is pretty badass. It's an answer you so often hear kids say when you ask them what they want to be when they grow up: a pilot. He's not just a pilot however, he's a CH-53 helicopter pilot, a Captain in the Marines, that is the transporter into and from battle. From as little as he could remember, he knew he wanted to fly. Graduated from UT Austin with a Kinesiology degree and went right into the Marines. I respect that dream more and more as he trains, flies, does missions, and night flights.. that's dedication. It's dedication to his Marines, because he has taken the job to get them into war safely and remove them from harms way while taking fire. His helo is the only one that is used to pick up other jets and Humvee's, and can even load them up for transport. He may think this is mute information but I guarantee you 90% of you reading this are at least somewhat impressed. I am, just typing it.

His pride and ambition are fun to feed off of, so when he left for Afghanistan this past Monday it was actually hard to feel bad or scared for him. I'm proud. Between now and then there will be ups and downs just as if he were here, I'm sure. I Facebook Messaged him for only 20 minutes tonight before he had to go.. that's all I got. I'm not used to this and I don't know what to expect. Every day is a new day with something else to learn. I understand the first and fifth months are the worst, and emotions vary from sad to angry to hurt to lonely.. but strength is in there. My routine having to change is the worst reminder, on top of people constantly asking how you're doing. Which I do appreciate tremendously, but know that it's hard to keep focused on anything but that topic as it is - so when you ask, you could very well find me losing it. I told him it feels like the twilight zone.. it's weird that he's not here, and as much as I tell my brain that you're on the other side of the world - the rest of me doesn't understand. So when I hear someone say 'they just don't understand', in this situation, I do.
I'm a happy girl and I have a crazy busy life, so I'll be ok. Friends and family have provided the prayers and support for him that make me comfortable knowing it'll all be alright. Devouring a load of mexican food and an entire pizza to myself will have to cease, but it's ok to let loose for a minute. :) RIGHT?! Yoga, dodgeball, soccer, and kickboxing with a mix of massages in there should keep me content. Projects are always my favorite, so making routine boxes and care packages for this man of mine will be fun. Summer will be here before I know it and then BAM, he'll be home for the holidays.

Maybe just take this as a reminder to hug a military friend, acquaintance, family member, or even a complete stranger, and say thank you. It's not just the bullets they put themselves in front of, it's the raw human connections that they'd rather fight to protect first than enjoy. For those on this end that are awaiting their significant other, hang in there. That's the best comment or piece of advice I've heard so far. You don't have to ask how we are - you know already.. and don't tell us it'll be ok, because nothing is promised.. just say you'll pray for them, and to hang in there.

All in 2 days.
7 more months in counting..